- 2013 (80)
- 2012 (213)
- 2011 (226)
- 2010 (249)
- 2009 (280)
- 2008 (302)
- 2007 (302)
- 2006 (301)
Here is the weekly Meezer Monday Miles Report
The Foods Report
Last week we hadded: steak, pork, ice cream, eggs and pancakes yesterday morning. We also hadded, but didn't eat: squash, salad, hot sausage, green beans, and beets.
The Billy Report:
Billy is feeling some better. He has not been to the v-e-t yet as green papers are short right now, but he is not coughing anymore and his wheezing is almost gone. the v-e-t saided when Billy saw him the ferst time that he would haf these prollems prolly for his whole life. But he's feeling better.
Here is Sammy with another exciting Alien Report:
SAMMY: Ok, so not only has the alien disguised as a woofie named Dutchess EATEN the man that used to live in their house next-door-behind-us, but i think that she has terrorized the people that live next-door-next-door to us move. There was a big metal monster with wheels in the backyard today and they were throwing everything from their house into it. at least they didn't get eated.
Back to you Miles
The Award Report
Ok, we have beaten the mom up enought to post our awards. We gotted an award from Princess-Isis but we can't seem to get it off her bloggie. But we gotted this one from her too!
We gotted this from our furriend Tesla (her mommy needs sponsors for her walk for the Humane Society - so please go check it out if you want)
Until We Meet at The Bridge
Nels, we hope your final sail on the Cat o Nine Tails was the best.
ME is mad at the mom lady person. The Mom Lady Person PROMISED that we could do a award Friday, 'acuase we haf gotted awards from our furriends (like Tesla and Princess Isis) but NOOOOO the mom lady person is too tired to help. BOOOOO for the mom lady person. She finks that she can just feed me chick-hen and that ME will forgive her. she don't know me furry well at all!!!
ok, yes she does. But ME is still a little mad.
if she gives ME ice cream, maybe ME will not be mad at all anymore.
Thirteen things heard around the house this week
1. Who whapped the crunchies from the table to the floor? - um who do you THINK did that you silly woman?
2. Miles, are you trying to get inside my skin? just sit down next to me.
3. Billy, get out of Miles' food
4. SAMMY! stop whapping the remote into my head and let me sleep
5. sheesh Billy, what in the heck did you eat?
6. Billy, please stop pooting
7. Miles - really, you don't need to be IN my skin
8. Sammy, want some butt skritchies? - well DUH! yeah I want butt skritchies
9. snnnooooorrrrrrrrkkkkkkkk (the sound of mommy asleep on the couch)
10. Miles, stop poking me in the butt
11. Miles, you do not like peaches, get your head out of my dish
12. Billy, my finger is not food
13. Sammy, mommy loves you - you're my special little boyfriend
Ferst, we 'pologize for not getting around to many of you yesterday, and today and prolly tomorrow too. The Mom is "busy" at "werk" and has "meetings" 7 hours out of her day. Then she gets home and falls asleep on the couch. Lazy. and inexcuse-able
My Meezer Rule for today: don't cut the beans any slack or allow any excuses.
Building on Miles' flustration with mommy, I got 'ahind her last night and whapped her head with my back feets for about 27 hours (Mom's note: 10 minutes) so that she knowed that I was mad about not being able to visit my furriends.
Ok, now, efurryone go to Simply Siamese and find out what our 'aciting news is. Latte and I needs your help there!!!!
Me does not mean to be bad boy and pee on bed. Me pees in the box all the other times. Me is furry furry sorry. (me knows mommy is not mad at me). Me got putted back in the play pen one night and me SCREAMED all night long - non stop. So me does not go back there. Me cannot be put in human litterbox room because me SCREAMS all night long. Me has a cough too. Mommy says like a little sticky person wif a cold or new-monia. Mommy says that ME may haf to go to the v-e-t. Me is sorry!! Please don't take me to the v-e-t. The last time ME was there he stealed my hoo-has. Me doesn't haf anyfing else for him to steal. Please don't banish me from the sleeping room! ME will try harder!!!!!
Ok, so ME gets to say::
The Dad person gotted the jobbie he innerviewed for!! YAY!!! He says "FANK YOU" for all the purrs and purrayers.
The Alien Report - By Sammy
It's getting worse at the house next door behind us. The alien disguised as a boxer woofie named Dutchess has been out in the yard jumping and hollering all weekend. At least I have seen the girl sticky bean that lives there, so I know that the alien has not eaten her. No sign of the man that lived there though. It's not looking good. Do you think I should call the government? Back to you Miles
No, Sammy, I don't think you should call the government, I think you should call a sigh-ki-a-trist.
The Mom Report
The mom did not get the my-grane that she thought she was going to get. but her back is herty. she's a wreck.
The Bill Report
Ok, mommy is just flustrated with Billy. He has peed on the bed in the middle of the night every night for almost 2 weeks. It's making mommy nutso hafing to get up in the middle of the night to change the sheets. She cannot close us out of the room all night 'acause that's where our litterboxes are, and that's the only place they will fit. She gotted some feliway, so maybe that will help him. She's not mad at him, she's just flustrated. And tired. really really tired.
The weather report
Apparently even though it's getting cooler out, i still give mommy the hots by playing velcro kitty. last night i was laying on her side and she complained that she was getting the hots, and she picked me up - her shert was all wet from sweat where i was laying against her.
The Meezer Dad Report
Daddy's jobbie is ending on Sept 30. He has a innerview today for a new jobbie, so please say some purrayers that he gets it, so that he's not out of werk again.
We be all set to sail on our pirate adventures!!!
We be Skull Crusher Left Eye Billy, Cannibal Long Ben Miles and Surgeon Blood and Guts Sammy. Will ye all join us on our adventures?
Ferst, we haf some sad news to report. Our bean furriend Leslie (who was The Divine Miss Marilyn's mom) lost her mom yesterday. She had been ill, but it still very sad. We would like to ask everyone to stop by her blog and offer a kind word.
Today we will all take turns saying what we is thankful for
SAMMY - I am thankful for all of our wonderful furriends in the cat blogosphere. No matter what happens, good or bad, we all pull together and support and love each other.
BILLY SweetFeets: ME is thankful for not hafing to live outside anymore. ME likes it in here where it's safe.
MILES I am thankful that I get all the kissies I want from mom.
And I'm thankful that Billy's poots are deadlier than mine so that mommy can tolerate mine more now.
Rule for this week: When it's the HOTS outside and inside, playing velcro kitty will make the beans nuts.
Whapping lesson for the week: whapping those things that stick in the wall that make stuff werk (like the alarm clock and the talking picture box) will also make the beans nuts. Hey, it's not MY fault that the don't fit in the little holes the right way and the pluggie things are loose and can be whapped out of the holes. Sheesh. what, am I 'posed to be a 'lektrishun or something?
ME GOTS A PIRATE NAME!!!! YAY!!!!! Friday is MEOW LIKE A PIRATE DAY!!!!
FAGIN!!!! DANA!!!! ISIS!!!! WHAT IS YOUR PIRATE NAMES??
(MILES: BILLY! please stop yelling!!)
UPDATE::: MY new furriend Princess Isis haf a post about ME today (ok, all a us). ME is so 'acited. Isis is a furry beautiful eskie woofie (just like my furriend Maxx!!) and she wants furriends. So if you haf not been over to bisit her, go NOW! Oh, wait, read my pirate name ferst then go!!!
SORRY!!! Here is my pirate name!!!
Your Pirate Name Is...
Here is the Meezer Monday report
The Weather Report: We had a bad case of the HOTS this weekend. the REALLY REALLY REALLY HOTS. We had lots and lots of rains too on Caturday. We is furry happy that our furriends in Texas are ok from Ike. We hopes that none of them hadded bad damage.
The Foods Report: Ok, this weekend we hadded chick-hen, and pork roast, and bacon and eggs. and corn on the cob. it was a purrty good weekend
The Aliens Report - By Sammy
The Alien that lives next door behind us (yes, next door behind us), that is holding the people hostage is still there. But I think she might haf eated one of the people that lives there. There has been no sighting of the man that was there. I will haf to investigate further. Back to you Miles
The 'It's been a sad weekend' report
Our dear old friends Moose (a fellow TomCat in Kukka's TomCat stable), Nala and Turtle announced that they are no longer going to be blogging, 'acause life is furry busy for them. We will miss them so much. And Daisy's beautiful sister Pixie ran off to the Bridge over the weekend. Her poor broken heart could not hold out anymore. Can we just say that losing furriends stinks??
The Mom Report
Do you know what that woman did on Sunday morning? SHE LOCKED US OUT OF THE SLEEPING ROOM!! So what that it was 4am and we were running back and forth on the bed and rassling and hollering. That's NO reason to lock us out of the sleeping room. Neither is the my-grane that she said she was getting. So we throwed ourselfs at the door for 2 hours until she could not take that anymore either. Sheesh.
That is the Miles Report for today.
I was wrong. The bladder walk happened at 1:31am Thursday. We could not even wait till 2:03 am. Are we sorry. of course not. unless it will get us tem-tay-shuns. Then we are very sorry.
Sammy started hollering in the hallway at about 4:30am Thursday. He forgot he was the one that got out of bed.
well, we tried to follow her rules.
Ok, not really. they're stoopid rules.
Please let me take the time today to re-iterate some rules to you, that will help to make this a less chaotic home.
1. I realize you all have your snuggle needs and I am not home all day so we will try the following schedule: every time I go in the Human Litterbox Room, you will all get 1 minute of lap and kissy time. Hopefully this will reduce the number of times that some meezer bites my legs. (MILES: HEY!!! I needs my attenshuns!!)
2. I require 5 minutes of uninterrupted dinner time so that I can actually eat some of my own food. (MILES: um. NO. Oh, and Billy cannot count to 5 either)
3. When you go upstairs and I am still downstairs, please refrain from hollering to me the whole time you are up there. You can go to the litterbox without the constant updates as to your progress (SAMMY: well, sometimes I forget that I'm the one that left the living room.)
4. I realize that I only have 2 hands, however, there is no need to swat at my legs when I'm trying to give you breakfast (BILLY: BUT ME IS STARVING!!!)
5. Walking across my bladder is forbidden from this day forward. (MILES - um, how long do you really think that will last? Personally, I give it until 2:03 am tomorrow)
Thank you for your cooperation in these matters. I am sure that by working toge........ HEY, you better change your attitudes young men, or there will be NO TEM-TAY-SHUNS.
Sammy, Miles and Billy: Um, ok. Yes Mommy (mom lady person) you have furry reasonable demands that we will have no prollems following.
Meezer Mom: I see your claws crossed behind your backs.
Sometimes the wild kittens PLAY PLAY PLAY can lead to new discoveries, like where all of the tem-tay-shuns packets are hidden. We are on to you now lady!!!!
Note to all kitties: sometimes a good whap to the head of a bean just makes you feel better. who cares if it doesn't make THEM feel better.
Well, those MEEZERS would not let ME help wif the Miles Report, so ME is doing the BILL REPORT.
THE MOM LADY REPORT
::SIGH:: ME thinks that ME likes the mom lady person lots. ME follows her around the house and ME eats her dinner wif her and ME watches her in the big water place when she splashes around, and ME lays on her feets at night.
THE FOODS REPORT
ME likes the foods here. but ME gets yelled at lots 'acuse ME "steals" foods from the plate, or ME grabs the mom lady person's hand to try and eat the foods. ME likes chick-hen and beast the bestest.
THE MAXX REPORT
MAXX camed to visit me last night while hims woofie daddy taked hims woofie mommy to the hospital. We played "BUS STOP". It's a really FUN game. ME lays down on my back and then ME grabs him by hims collar unner his neck and then him drags me all over the house. The mom lady person was running after us trying to take pikshurs and video but we was too fast. but ME thinks ME gotted rug burn on my hiney.
THE FURRIENDS REPORT
ME is happy to announce that my Ginger friends Colby and Cheddar gifed ME (ok US) these really cool awardies!!!!! FANK YOU COLBY AND CHEDDAR!!!!
Mommy says that ME can gif them out on Friday.
Here is the Meezer Monday Miles Report
THE FOODS REPORT:
This weekend we gotted: eggs, bacon, ham, chick-hen, corn on the cob (it ROCKS y'all, you should try it!) and steak. Not a bad weekend.
THE RAIN REPORT:
We gotted some rain but not as much as the weather guy on the talking picture box saided we might.
THE SPORTS REPORT:
We haf invented a new game that should be in the 'lympics next time. It's called Bowling for Mom. What you do is make sure that you run in front of the mom every three steps. or stand under her feets. Or walk sideways in front of her on the stairs and then stop short. Good times. Good times.
THE ALIEN REPORT - BY SAMMY
Sammy Meezer here with the Alien report. There have been LOTS of aliens this weekend. The drooly alien called "Dutchess" that is holding the family that lives behind us hostage, and his nasty minions the ginger kitties, are getting ready to move the family somewhere else. I think that the agents that hunt for aliens are on to them. There are new aliens over there all the time taking obvious implements of torture out of their house and putting them in the pick-em-up truck. it's very disturbing.
Back to you Miles
THE HOUSE TRASHING REPORT:
Everyone did such a wonderful job with the house trashing. Mommy was too tired to even try and clean anything. way to go cat blogosphere!!!!!
That concludes the Miles report for today.
'afore I start our Thursday 13, I want to tell Eric and Flynn and Sweet Ariel that we will post the awards you gifed us tomorrow. We has been thinking and thinking about who to pass them on to and then mommy made some lame excuse about working lots and and lots and being too busy to help us until tomorrow. So please don't think we forgotted about you - our mommy is just rude.
On to the Thursday 13.
Thirteen Stoopid nicknames heard around casa di Meezer the last few weeks (and these are for all of us, not just me)
1. Sugar Pants (Billy)
2. huggle buggle (Sammy)
3. sweet knees (me - how 'barassing)
4. stinky breath - (me)
5. koogle (Sammy)
6. Boo-dah (Sammy)
7. angel face (Billy)
8. bloo eyed baby (me)
9. bloo eyed googly man (Sammy)
10. sugar butt (Billy) (and um NO it's not made of sugar, it's made of STINK).
11. kissy kissy man (me)
12. baby bloo eyes boyfriend (me)
13. crossed eyed goober boyfriend (Sammy)
Do you SEE what we haf to put up wif on a daily basis?????
ooooooooo, sometimes the mom's are right when they tell you that a food could give you flaming butt. (and WHO would put habanero peppers in short rib sauce? ::SIGH:: I just licked a LITTLE BIT).
The whappage for Tuesday: One brand new roll of human litterbox paper whapped directly into the human litterbox, WHILE the mom was in the human litterbox room playing with her head furs. SCORE!!!!!
YAY!!!! FANK YOU efurryone for coming to mine purrfday party and leaving me happy purrfday messages!!!!
ME hadded a wonderful purrfday. AND GUESS WHAT ME DID???
Yesterday morning ME letted the mom lady person huggle and snuggle on me for 25 whole minutes in bed 'afore ME gotted squirmy and gotted down. ME efen purred. Is this what mancats do?