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So, there's this show on the talking pikshur box about being smarter than some little kid. Mommy was watching last night and all I haf to say about it is this:
Mommy couldn't even get a FERST GRADE grammer queschun right? Oh, and to that guy from the PKA fraternity - the sun rises in the NORTH? Seriously dude, you're in kollig? Really, maybe I should take the test to get into kollig. I mean, I SAT around the house yesterday. I could soooo pass that test.
Ok, so then after that there was some show on about songs. This is the WRONG show for our mommy to watch. Wanna know why? 'cause she just always makes up her own werds. BUT, the one song was to some TV show called Green Acres. OH BROTHER, why did they haf to play that song? She sang that stoopid song for HOURS. (mom's note: about 5 minutes). I do haf one thing to say about that show though, from what i've heard, all of those contestants sing werse than mommy. And she sings like a screaming cow.
By saying to someone on the phone "somemeezer named Sammy must have whapped my full glass of water onto the couch while I was in the kitchen" you DO mean that an alien came into the house and threw water on your seat on the couch.
You would NEVER accuse ME of something like that.
So, here's my rule for today: bad breaf is an awsome tool to get someone out of bed in the morning. So is a well placed stomp on the bladder.
Good morning Mommy!
From time to time, you will see some posts about things you might like to buy. We have signed up with Smorty to get paid to write some posts.
BUT, we found someting GREAT to write about! Christmas presents!!! Digital Photo Frames! Now, this is a great idea to get your mom or food lady or dad or grammie or grampie, so that they can always look at you. Who would not like a Digital Picture Frame! Oh, and the moms and dads and grammie and grampies can look at their blurpy things with them too. So, go check them out!
digital picture frame
|You Are Vixen|
Sexy and sultry, you're the one all the other reindeer dream about.
Why You're Naughty: That fur pulling spat you got into with Dancer over Santa.
Why You're Nice: Because even when you're nice, you're still delightfully naughty!
|You Are Prancer|
You are the perfect reindeer, with perfect hooves and perfect flying form.
Why You're Naughty: Because you're Santa's pet, and you won't let anyone show you up.
Why You're Nice: You have the softest fur and the sweetest carrot breath.
mmmmm - pecan pie
|You Are Pecan Pie Soda|
|You Are Broccoli Casserole Soda|
So, yesterday was turkey day. Mommy offered me some turkey, but I was not shur about it, so I didn't eat it. Miles scarfed his down That's prolly 'cause he threw up twice yesterday. Once when Mommy waked up and then again when they gotted home from thanksgiving dinner. I might thaf liked the broccoli that I heard they had for dinner, but did she bring ME any? NOOOOOOOOO. She hates me or somefing.
Meezer Mom: Sammy, broccoli is, how shall i put this nicely, a gaseous food.
Mom, I won't poot. I'm not like Miles.
Meezer Mom: Sammy, since you sleep with your booty right near my face most nights, i'm not willing to take that chance. Besides, there's a bucket with some wilted beet greens and broccoli leaves in the hall.
I know Mommy, but it would haf been nice of you to bring ME somefing speshul for Thanksgiving.
Oh Sammy, my sweetie little meezer man, come here and get some belly skritches.
Nope, sorry Mommy, that's not....................um.........stop........... purr............stop...............purrrrrrrrrrrrr..........really mommy i'm mad at you.........purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrsssssss.....can I haf a hamstring rub now?
oh, don't call me a sweetie little meezer man in public. it's 'barassing! I'm a manly mancat.
Of course you are my sweetie manly little meezer mancat.
MOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM. ::sigh:: she's hopeless.
it did not hert when I crashed into the corner running up the stairs. why?
Meezer Rule: always act like you meant to make the mistake.
Ferst of all, why does she feel the need to wake me when i'm on my gizzy quilt and sleeping so nice?
So, mommy hadded her 3rd phone innerview for the jobbie she really really wants. It was a tek-ni-kal innerview, so she was slightly freaked. then she hadded to drive 85 miles to anofur innerview. She hopes she didded ok on bof of them. So....... we will just haf to wait and see and purray.
Meezer Mom: I want to thank each and every one of you for your thoughts and prayers. I really appreciate all of them. It's been a rough road the last year without steady work for me and Meezer Dad. We could really use a little spell of good luck right now, so I thank you all for all of the kind words and strength you have given me. This Thanksgiving I am so grateful for all of the wonderful friends we have made here in the cat blogosphere.
HEY! I didn't say you could take ofur our blog Mommy!
****UPDATE: Mommy did not get the jobbie she wanted. They said they wanted to "pass". Please say some purrayers for us, we really need a job. Thank you.
Mommy says "fank you" for all the purrs for her innerview this morning. If she's not crying or freaked out or anyfing after, we will try and update later today. otherwise, we will calm her down and update tomorrow. Fank you all so much, we loves you all!
our good friend Sly and our good friend Mickey tagged us for some meme's. Sly would like some random facts and Mickey would like to know what we would put in our "Box of Life". So, ferst:
More random facts about us
1. Mommy thinks Sammy walks like a soldier - his steps are always exactly the same length, even when he runs. He doesn't gallop around the house like me - it's more like he double-time marches.
2. when I lay unner the covers, I haf to lay on top of the top sheet and unner the blankie or quilt - nefurr unner the top sheet next to akshual human flesh.
3. I'm either really clingy and haf to be near mommy ALL the time, or I completely ignore her and spend my time upstairs away from her.
4. Sammy is the pickiest eater that mommy has efur seen.
5. I am not a very picky eater, however, lately, I have not been eating all the stinky goodness I get.
6. I am terrified of the front door to the outside when it is open. Sammy is too.
7. We do, however, like it when the slidy door is open and we can sit in front of the screen. As long as no one gets near us. If someone gets near us, we run fast to the upstairs and unner the bed.
Ok, now for the 2nd meme:
A SIMPLE BUT VERY IMPORTANT MEME: List your treasures and tag other kitties and their humans also, as many as you like. Let this reflection spread through out the world. We need to count our contentments as Blessings!~~~What do you look back over and treasure enough to place inside your BOX OF LIFE?~~~
1. Sammy - I would put my fev-ver toys in my box of life
2. Miles - I would put some ham in my box of life
3. Sammy - I would put my snuggle time in bed wif mommy in my box of life.
4. I would put my windowsill and couch kissies wif mommy in my box of life
5. I would put my skritching time on the dining room table in my box of life
6. I would put all thet sweet things mommy says to me in my box of life - even my nickname Poosie.
7. I would put tons of purrrsss and love for kitties who have no homes in my box of life.
8. I would put all my purrrsss for sick kitties and beans in my box of life - so that I never run out.
We would like to tag Frostin and his court for the memes (either or both, they can pick), and we would like to tag Sly for the Box of Life Meme, and we would like to tag William and Russell and Caroline and Olivia for either or both. We would like to tag Patches, Mittens, Mistrie and Precious for either or both a well.
PS - please keep purring for mommy's innerview Monday! She's starting to get nervous!
Ok, so mommy gotted a call today for a 3rd phone innerview for the jobbie she really really really wants. If she passes this phone innerview, she may get called to go for a face to face innerview in mare-uh-land (although that is not where she will be werking, she will be werking from home or traveling around the east coast). She is nervous and really really really wants this jobbie (and we need it badly too!). So, her innerview is Monday at 9am, so if we could ask you again for your purrsss. Cat blogosphere purrs are furry powerful- they haf gotten jobbies for other mommies and daddies and brought kitties home from being lost, and helped lots of kitties get better.
Thanks! we loves you all!
So, as I was wandering around hollering yesterday, I gotted to thinking these thoughts:
why isn't there just cheese flavored stinky goodness? I likes cheese
oo, ham and cheese stinky goodness would be awsome
how DOES that pikshur printer werk? it's so fascinating
THUNDERING HERD OF ELEFANTS!!!
HEY! come out to the kit-chen! NOW! HURRY!!
what? I didn't call you? you're getting crazy mommy
QUICK, COME BACK TO THE KIT-CHEN!!
::Sigh:: noooooo YOU'RE nuts mommy
can't a cat just sing without getting the 3rd degree?
what's daddy doing here? it's not the weekend
oh, and innerview? good luck daddy!
THUNDERING HERD OF ELEFANTS!!
come on, you don't recognize the song i'm singing? "i light up my life, la lala la la lala la I light up my life"
oh, ok, I think I'll take a nap now.
My wonderful and dear friend Detective Skeeter, has solved the case of my Unaccountably Wet Head.
Meezer Rule: When in doubt, hire a great detective.
So, here are his findings:
Detective Skeeter and The Unaccountably Wet-Headed Meezer
SITUATION: Miles Meezer reports not doin anything wrong, but getting his head wetted for no known reason. Reports no water onna floor, didn�t dip head in the water dish, an says there was a rainy shower inna kitchen. The Mom was out of the room, not a witness to the event
OK. I'm usually invited into places to seeks after-facts. But liquid is tricksie stuff and goes away fast. So I hadda invoke my time-travel routine. Well, it really isn't so much time-TRAVEL as time-viewing. I hope Miles an Sammie won't mind, but I put myself up on a tall place with my �astro-cat� presence in their place an replayed the events of the day. It's genetics, don't ask me to 'splain about it
It started with the dish-washing That's no surprise to me. I've seen it happen before. When all was quiet, I took some counter-scrapings and sent them off to the lab. I knew what to expect, but I like to be sure, ya know. I suspected that Miles had been exposed to Dihydrogen monoxide! Nasty stuff! It collects. It pools together and searches fer a place to get on over edges an down. Its evil stuff, and you have to watch out fer it!
It is also known as hydric acid, and is the major component of acid rain.
* contributes to the "greenhouse effect."
* may cause severe burns in vapor form.
* contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
* accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
* may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.
* has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.
Some Beins may think it is jus stuf, but I know better. It has attacked more than a few kitties before.
Serious stuff, I tell you. We can drink it, but it has all those other consequences.
With the lab report back (positive for Dihydrogen monoxide) I went back a little further in time
Wet dishes get placed on the counter. The stuff collects. It is dragged by gravity to surface edges. That's where Miles was attacked by the awful stuff.
It was the fork (possibly a spoon; astral vision is a bit fuzzy)! It was sitting with an end just over the counter. When the Dihydrogen monoxide liquid reached the edge of the counter and contacted the fork handle hanging JUST over the edge, it suddenly made a freedom break towards gravity via the well-known principle of vishus deer attack.
Unfortunately for Miles, he was standing with his head directly unner the escape path of the evil liquid ! The liquid Dihydrogen monoxide fell onto his head as he was standing there (through no fault of his own) and that caused the wetting of his head.
I conclude the following:
1. Miles was not responsible for his head getting all wetted.
2. He was struck by an unexpected gravity attack of Dihydrogen monoxide.
3. You can�t trust a fork hanging over the edge of a countertop
4. Dihydrogen monoxide is really terrible stuff
I hope that solves the mystery of the unaccountably wetted head ;)
Usual cost is one can of tuna an some nip, but this is for free (it was too easy). Watch for my story in the next We Are The Kitties book for serious Detective Skeeter work.
::SIGH:: So, the tek-ni-kal innerview wasn't really a tek-ni-kal innerview after all, and mommy freaked out for nofing. BUT, if they want to innerview her MORE, then the next one MIGHT be a tek-ni-kal innerview. we just want the freak-out to stop. So keep your paws crossed that they call her for anofur innerview.
now. back to the impawtant things - US.
I felled off the back of the couch last night, bounced off the table 'ahind it and ended up on my back on the floor. and what did mommy do? did she jump up, run to the back of the couch and pick me up and kiss my boo boo?
well, yeah, she akshually did. THEN she laffed and laffed at me.
OH, and to add insult to injery, when I was rolling around on my dining room table, and she was gifing me butt skritches, she said I efen hadded peg-legs when i was laying down! now, that's just RUDE. I. DOES. NOT. HAF. PEG. LEGS.
Regarding my head being unaccountably wet the other day. I was not in the sink (mommy says that I can't get my fat butt up that high, but I think that's just rude). I was not swimming in my water dish - it's too small for my whole head to fit in. I was not swimming in the human litterbox either. Sammy might do that, but not me. We really cannot figure out how I got wet. I STILL say there was a rain storm in the kit-chen.
Daddy camed home for the weekend. We hadded fun. He did not bring my foo-ton with him though. He is going back to his house today. I heard some talk that he may come back here to stay, if the jobbie situation is still really bad.
Mommy has a phone innerview at 9:30am that she is really freaked out about. She really really really wants this job, but it's a technical innerview for a consultant posishun diong something called PCI-DSS for 'puters. She is scairt to death because she nefur does well on technical innerviews - she is better talking face to face and showing someone what she can do. It's like an oral test and she is not good with oral tests. Please purray for her 'cause we really need this jobbie badly.
She also has another innerview (face to face) on Tuesday and ANOTHER innerview next Monday, so keep the purrayers coming that SOMEONE hires her.
-Yes, we need to run the Meezer 500 at 11:19 at night
-Yes, if the crunchy dish is empty, we haf efurry right to boob-walk at 3am
-WHY can't I jump on Sammy from the balcony when he is laying on the landing?
-YES, it did hert when I ran head ferst into the table next to the couch. I did it because it feels better when the pain stops.
-I like poking you in the butt with my claw - it's the CLAW OF DOOM
um, so last night i was hanging out in the kit-chen while mommy had her lazy butt, errrr, was sitting on the couch, and when I camed in to sit next to her, my head was soaking wet. No, I didn't dip it in the water dish. I really don't know what happened. I was dry, and then I was wet. No water on the floor. I say that there was a sudden rain shower in the kitchen right over my head. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
Thirteen Things I haf whapped this week:
1. Stack of CD's from my dining room table
2. empty canning jars from my dining room table
3. The DSL modem (about 12 times) from the table behind the couch
4. The powerstrip for the 'puter, DSL modem and printer, from the table behind the couch (at least 5 times)
5. The roll of toilet paper from the big windowsill in the human litterbox room (we can't haf it on the roll, because Miles will shred it or eat it).
6. The roll of toilet paper from it's NEW spot on the sink in the human litterbox room
7. A can of crushed pineapple from my dining room table (it went with the empty canning jars for some goo called Green Tomato Jam. sounds gross to me).
8. Miles, from my dining room table
9. the radio from the bedside table
10. a glass of water from the table next to the couch
11. a bottle of baby loshun from the window sill in the human litterbox room
12. Mommy's bottle of tub bubbles from the side of the tub in the human litterbox room
13. A Yankee Candle (the big jar!) from the coffee table in the living room.
It's been a great week for whapping!
Sammy and I got to be at Mission Control for the launch. At ferst, I thought they said LUNCH. and I was so 'acited. Then I saw all the 'puters and realized that they didn't mean lunch. It was furry loud, but 'aciting too!
We is furry 'acited about the landing. We is going to teleport ofur to Sammy's girlfriend Abby's house 'acause they live close to where the shuttle will land.
This is Daytona International Race Track. This is the ferst track I raced the bus on! I went FAST!!!!! I mean REALLY FAST! RAMMING SPEED fast!! I was going at LEAST 100! Without a restrictor plate too! The kitties on the road trip were in the bus when I was driving. That was prolly a mistake. There were tem-tay-shuns flying efurrywhere. And them some kitties got the barfs. I felt bad about that, but did I mention that it was AWSOME FUN to drive that fast?
Sammy was driving the bus here - you can almost see how fast it was going. Did you know that it's really a bad thing to get a speeding ticket when you are a cat without a driver's license? AND, the police do not think that a cat that's 3 years old is really old enough to drive? Good thing Sammy could outrun the police!
We are glad we are back home now with Mommy. Traveling is nice, but really
There's No Place Like Home!
About 5 of these - are there any naked necked cats out there who these belong to?
The Road Trip for True Love arrived in New Mexico to unite Lucky with Luxor.
I got to drive the big red party bus, but it was not ME that got pulled over for speeding. Fortunately, Lucky batted her eyes at the police dog and got us out of getting thrown in jail.
we went trick or treating. I dressed up like Charlie Brown. I got a rock.
We're off to California next!